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IFZTA

The International Frank Zappa Tournament of Albumz

Now that we have made it through the New Year, and all Y2K bugs apparently have been squashed, it is time for us to look forward to the events of 2000.  Since the waning days of 1999, teams have been narrowing their focus and beginning the long, hard climb towards this year's Tournament of Albums.  Last year's Tournament of Songs lived up to the hype (see IFZTS), culminating in a blood-letting battle between the quick and cunning "Peaches en Regalia" and the inspired monster and eventual champion "Inca Roads".   All of this year's teams in some way or another took place in last year's month long marathon of musical matches, and are hoping to use last year's experience to push them toward's the top in this year's war.

It is now March somewhere in the world,
so the 2000 International Frank Zappa Tournament of Albums shall begin!

Your job:
vote for one album in each of the following head-to-head battles, e-mail me your selections, and help decide who makes it to the next round. It is as simple as that.

Enjoy.

THE FINALS

In this corner, weighing in at a light 6 songs only, armed with an arsenal of instrumental expertise ranging from soaring saxophones to swirling keyboards to never-say-die guitar solos, utilising a scant two minutes of vocals only, and consisting of three songs which never saw the light of day in a concert setting, the #1 Seed in the Eastern Conference and the #4 Seed Overall, an album which soundly defeated "Broadway the Hard Way","Overnite Sensation", "We're Only In It for the Money", AND "One Size Fits All", the odds-on favorite to take home the title-

HOT RATS

In this corner, weighing in at a hefty 30 tracks over 3 compact discs, an album which almost never saw the light of Officially Released day, armed with an overflowing arsenal complete with guitar solos, avant-garde noise, potentially offensive lyrics, soaring instrumentals, cut-and-paste madness, bonus tracks, live tracks, studio tracks, and everything but the kitchen sink, the #2 Seed in the European Conference and the #7 Seed Overall, an album which defeated "Shut Up 'n' Play Yer Guitar", "Make A Jazz Noise Here", "Roxy and Elsewhere", AND "Uncle Meat", the underdog whose bite is as vicious as its bark-

LATHER

THE FINAL FOUR FINAL RESULTS

What may be the most unexpected upset of the tournament occurred in this round.  The #1 Overall Seed- "One Size Fits All"- was unable to hold its own against the #4 Overall Seed- "Hot Rats".   Also, the #6 Overall Seed "Uncle Meat" lost to the #7 Overall Seed "Lather".

NORTH AMERICAN FINALS- Tower Theater, Philadelphia, PA

ROUND FOUR RESULTS

Two upsets in the Euro/Scan conference.  #2 "Lather" soundly defeated #1 "Roxy", while the #2 "Uncle Meat" eeked out a victory over the lower seeded but tough-as-hell "Burnt Weeny Sandwich".  BWS had defeated the overall #2 seed "Joe's Garage" in the previous round, and was looking to walk into the finals after that performance.  But "Uncle Meat" whipped out the feared King Kong offense in the final hours and won the match by one vote.  Of the four remaining albums, two are from the '60's, one from '74/'75, and one from '76/'77.

NORTH AMERICAN SEMIFINALS- The Palladium, NYC, NY

EURO/SCAN SEMIFINALS- Hammersmith Odeon, London, England