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IFZTA

The International Frank Zappa Tournament of Albumz

 

Now that we have made it through the New Year, and all Y2K bugs apparently have been squashed, it is time for us to look forward to the events of 2000.  Since the waning days of 1999, teams have been narrowing their focus and beginning the long, hard climb towards this year's Tournament of Albums.  Last year's Tournament of Songs lived up to the hype (see IFZTS), culminating in a blood-letting battle between the quick and cunning "Peaches en Regalia" and the inspired monster and eventual champion "Inca Roads".   All of this year's teams in some way or another took place in last year's month long marathon of musical matches, and are hoping to use last year's experience to push them toward's the top in this year's war.

 


It is now March somewhere in the world,
so the 2000 International Frank Zappa Tournament of Albums shall begin!

Your job:
vote for one album in each of the following head-to-head battles, e-mail me your selections, and help decide who makes it to the next round. It is as simple as that.

Enjoy.


THE FINALS

 

In this corner, weighing in at a light 6 songs only, armed with an arsenal of instrumental expertise ranging from soaring saxophones to swirling keyboards to never-say-die guitar solos, utilising a scant two minutes of vocals only, and consisting of three songs which never saw the light of day in a concert setting, the #1 Seed in the Eastern Conference and the #4 Seed Overall, an album which soundly defeated "Broadway the Hard Way","Overnite Sensation", "We're Only In It for the Money", AND "One Size Fits All", the odds-on favorite to take home the title-

HOT RATS

 

In this corner, weighing in at a hefty 30 tracks over 3 compact discs, an album which almost never saw the light of Officially Released day, armed with an overflowing arsenal complete with guitar solos, avant-garde noise, potentially offensive lyrics, soaring instrumentals, cut-and-paste madness, bonus tracks, live tracks, studio tracks, and everything but the kitchen sink, the #2 Seed in the European Conference and the #7 Seed Overall, an album which defeated "Shut Up 'n' Play Yer Guitar", "Make A Jazz Noise Here", "Roxy and Elsewhere", AND "Uncle Meat", the underdog whose bite is as vicious as its bark-

LATHER

 

WHO WILL WIN???

VOTE NOW AND HELP DECIDE!

 

 

THE FINAL FOUR FINAL RESULTS

What may be the most unexpected upset of the tournament occurred in this round.  The #1 Overall Seed- "One Size Fits All"- was unable to hold its own against the #4 Overall Seed- "Hot Rats".   Also, the #6 Overall Seed "Uncle Meat" lost to the #7 Overall Seed "Lather".


NORTH AMERICAN FINALS- Tower Theater, Philadelphia, PA

  1. HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

    (1) One Size Fits All

    (1) Hot Rats

    15 to 10 Hot Rats
  2.  

    EURO/SCAN FINALS- Isstadion, Stockholm, Sweden

  3. HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

    (2) Lather

    (2) Uncle Meat

    14 to 11 Lather

 

ROUND FOUR RESULTS

Two upsets in the Euro/Scan conference.  #2 "Lather" soundly defeated #1 "Roxy", while the #2 "Uncle Meat" eeked out a victory over the lower seeded but tough-as-hell "Burnt Weeny Sandwich".  BWS had defeated the overall #2 seed "Joe's Garage" in the previous round, and was looking to walk into the finals after that performance.  But "Uncle Meat" whipped out the feared King Kong offense in the final hours and won the match by one vote.  Of the four remaining albums, two are from the '60's, one from '74/'75, and one from '76/'77.

 

NORTH AMERICAN SEMIFINALS- The Palladium, NYC, NY

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) One Size Fits All

(2) The Grand Wazoo

18 to 11 OSFA

(1) Hot Rats

(2) We're Only In It for the Money

19 to 10 RATS


EURO/SCAN SEMIFINALS- Hammersmith Odeon, London, England

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Roxy and Elsewhere

(2) Lather

20 to 9 LATHER

(2) Uncle Meat

(4) Burnt Weeny Sandwich

15 to 14 UNCLE



ROUND THREE RESULTS

There was only one upset in Round 3, but it was a big one.  #4 "Burnt Weeny Sandwich", which gave solid but not great performances in the first two rounds, knocked off the steamrolling #1 "Joe's Garage", an album that conceded only one point in the prior rounds.  Other than this, all #1 and #2 seeds won as expected, with #2 "The Grand Wazoo" having the most difficulty with the tenacious #6 "Freak Out". Of the remaining 8 contenders, 4 are from the '60's, 3 from the '72-'74 years, and 1 from the late '70's.  There is no '80's or '90's music left in the running.

WESTERN CONFERENCE-  The Roxy, Hollywood, Ca

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) One Size Fits All vs 

(4) Zappa in New York

22 to 7 OSFA

(2) The Grand Wazoo vs 

(6) Freak Out

16 to 13 WAZOO

EASTERN CONFERENCE- Felt Forum, NYC, NY

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Hot Rats vs 

(5) Overnite Sensation

23 to 6 RATS

(2) We're Only In It for the Money vs 

(6) Waka/Jawaka

19 to 10 MONEY

EUROPEAN CONFERENCE-Festhalle Mustermesse, Basel, Switzerland

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Roxy and Elsewhere vs

(4) Civilization Phase III

23 to 8 ROXY

(2) Lather vs

(3) Make a Jazz Noise Here

20 to 11 LATHER

SCANDINAVIAN CONFERENCE- Scandinavium, Gothenburg, Sweden

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Joe's Garage vs 

(4) Burnt Weeny Sandwich

18 to 14 BURNT

(2) Uncle Meat vs 

(3) Sheik Yerbouti

20 to 12 UNCLE


ROUND TWO RESULTS

There were a couple of upsets in this round.  Two #3 seeds were defeated- both by #6 seeds- in the Western and Eastern Conferences.  Also, the #5 seed "Overnite Sensation" toppled the #4 seed "Absolutely Free" in the Eastern Conference.  All three upsets involved albums released in the '60's.   "Lumpy Gravy" and "Absolutely Free" were losers, while "Freak Out" was a surprise winner.  There are no Stage releases left in the running.  "Civilization III" and "Make a Jazz Noise Here" are the only albums released in the '90's still in the running, with the former barely beating out another '90's release, "The Yellow Shark".

WESTERN CONFERENCE- Pauly Pavilion, Los Angeles, CA.

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) One Size Fits All

(9) YCDTOSA I

24 to 6 OSFA

(2) The Grand Wazoo

(7) Apostrophe

20 to 10 WAZOO

(3) The Best Band You Never Heard In Your Life

(6) Freak Out

17 to 13 FREAK

(4) Zappa In New York

(5) You Are What You Is

19 to 11 ZINY

EASTERN CONFERENCE- Fillmore East, NYC, NY

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Hot Rats

(9) Broadway the Hard Way

28 to 3 RATS

(2) We're Only In It for the Money

(7) Zoot Allures

27 to 4 MONEY

(3) Lumpy Gravy

(6) Waka/Jawaka

19 to 12 WAKA

(4) Absolutely Free

(5) Overnite Sensation

17 to 14 OVERNITE

EUROPEAN CONFERENCE- Rainbow Theater, London, England

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Roxy and Elsewhere

(9) Them or Us

27 to 4 ROXY

(2) Lather

(7) Shut Up 'n' Play Yer Guitar

22 to 9 LATHER

(3) Make a Jazz Noise Here

(6) Bongo Fury

25 to 6 MAJNH

(4) Civilization III

(5) The Yellow Shark

16 to 13 CIV III

SCANDINAVIAN CONFERENCE- Folkets Hus, Stockholm, Sweden

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Joe's Garage

(9) Tinseltown Rebellion

28 to 1 JOES

(2) Uncle Meat

(10) Fillmore East

26 to 3 UNCLE

(3) Sheik Yerbouti

(11) Chunga's Revenge

22 to 7 SHEIK

(4) Burnt Weeny Sandwich

(5) YCDTOSA II

19 to 10 BURNT

 

ROUND ONE RESULTS

The higher seeds performed as expected throughout all 4 conferences, expect for the #8 seed, which lost in all 4 conferences.  The only other upsets were in the Scandinavian conference, where the #6 and #7 seeds also lost.   "Weasels Ripped My Flesh" is the only album released in the '60's not to make it to Round Two.  YCDTOSA I and II are the only Stage Volumes to make it past the first round.  None of the '90's compilation releases made it into Round Two (nor did they perform well in Round One.)  Finally, "Joe's Garage" and "The Grand Wazoo" were the only competitors to completely shut out their opponents.

WESTERN CONFERENCE- Fillmore West, San Francisco, CA

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) One Size Fits All

(16) Francesco Zappa

29 to 1 OSFA

(2) The Grand Wazoo

(15) Have I Offended Someone?

30 to 0 WAZOO

(3) The Best Band You Never Heard In Your Life

(14) Mystery Disc

27 to 3 TBBYNHIYL

(4) Zappa In New York

(13) Playground Psychotics

25 to 5 ZINY

(5) You Are What You Is

(12) London Symphony Orchestra I & II

22 to 7 YAWYI

(6) Freak Out 

(11) Sleep Dirt

19 to 11 FREAK

(7) Apostrophe

(10) 200 Motels

16 to 14 APOSTROPHE

(8) Guitar

(9) YCDTOSA I

20 to 10 YCDTOSA I

 

EASTERN CONFERENCE- Garrick Theater, NYC, NY

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Hot Rats

(16) Swiss Cheese/Fire

29 to 1 HOT RATS

(2)We're Only In It for the Money

(15) Everything is Healing Nicely

27 to 3 MONEY

(3) Lumpy Gravy

(14) The Lost Episodes

17 to 13 LUMPY

(4) Absolutely Free

(13) Baby Snakes

29 to 1 ABSOLUTELY

(5) Overnite Sensation

(12) Orchestral Favorites

25 to 5 OVERNITE

(6)Waka/Jawaka

(11) YCDTOSA V

24 to 6 WAKA

(7) Zoot Allures

(10) YCDTOSA IV

17 to 13 ZOOT

(8) Ship Arriving Too Late to Save a Drowning Witch

(9) Broadway the Hard Way

20 to 10 BTHW

 

EUROPEAN CONFERENCE- Grughalle, Essen, Germany

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Roxy and Elsewhere

(16) Son of Cheap Thrills

32 to 2 ROXY

(2) Lather

(15) Strictly Genteel

30 to 4 LATHER

(3) Make A Jazz Noise Here

(14) YCDTOSA III

27 to 7 MAJNH

(4) Civilization III

(13) The Perfect Stranger

33 to 1 CIV III

(5) The Yellow Shark

(12) Frank Zappa Plays the Music of Frank Zappa

27 to 7 SHARK

(6) Bongo Fury

(11) Cruising with Ruben and the Jets

23 to 11 BONGO

(7) Shut Up 'n' Play Yer Guitar

(10) Ahead of Their Time

26 to 8 SUNPYG

(8) Jazz From Hell

(9) Them or Us

19 to 15 TOU

 

SCANDANAVIAN CONFERENCE- Konserthuset, Stockholm , Sweden

HIGHER SEED LOWER SEED SCORE WINNER

(1) Joe's Garage

(16) Cheap Thrills

31 to 0 JOE'S

(2) Uncle Meat

(15) Strictly Commercial

29 to 2 UNCLE

(3) Sheik Yerbouti

(14) YCDTOSA VI

30 to 1 SHEIK

(4) Burnt Weeny Sandwich

(13) Frank Zappa Meets the Mothers of Prevention

24 to 7 BURNT

(5) YCDTOSA II

(12) Man From Utopia

26 to 5 YCDTOSA II

(6) Weasels Ripped My Flesh

(11) Chunga's Revenge

16 to 15 CHUNGA'S

(7) Thingfish

(10) Fillmore East

18 to 13 FILLMORE

(8) Just Another Band From LA

(9) Tinsletown Rebellion

16 to 15 TINSELTOWN